A week long work!

It's my last day off today and next week I will be a full time babysitter. Working 7 days a week and from that day on, i will no longer have a break. I just want to take this opportunity to earn money for the meantime and to be able to save for my studies in the future. I have been through a lot and I know this is just another challenge in my life and I can handle it with the help of the Lord. Because of him, I was able to do all these things. I believe that one day things will all turn out fine and that I will be a successful person in my chosen career. I am still at the defining point of my life, I am still realizing what I really want to do but I am getting there already. Living with happy memories I had in the Philippines, that's the reason why I keep holding on. Living a new life here in Australia, where everything is totally different, very strange and it seems that no people will ever care for you. I need to be tough because if not, then I will not be able to survive. It's good that I have my mother with me and my stepfather, my sister and my step grandma. Who were always there to give me support and make me strong.

Well, life is something we have to live. We have to go on with the flow, because if we keep contradicting things that are happening to us then we will never be happy.

MIDNIGHT thoughts!

Ok, why I am still awake this time of night. Huh, simply because there's so much chaos going in my mind. I want to bring them all out and let them go. Past is past anyway. My past is only an image that keeps on playing around my mind. It seems like it never happened...

What am I thinking??? I don't know REALLY. My thoughts are always DISORGANIZED. Im STRESSED and I hate it.

A while ago, I realized that the people I am with now are not my age. If I am not with kids, I am with people much older than me. I don't have a friend of my age who would really think the same way as me. Whom I can share my thoughts and just talk about life the way a 21 year old person views life.

Someone have told me also that she will introduced me to a 40+ year old man who is looking for a girlfriend, maybe I might be interested with him and I said NO! I don't like to have a boyfriend yet. All I want now is to be with my family and enjoy each moment that I am with them.

Until now, I am always thinking of going back in the Philippines. My life is much happier in there. I don't really need much money as long that I am not having a headache thinking what will be good for other people and not for me. I admit, I need money for my daily expenses, to help my mother and to save for my future plans of going back in the Philippines.

Ok, I appreciate when people tell me that I have to prepare for my future. To save for it but I don't want to sacrifice my happiness today for tomorrow. I just want to live each day of my life because what if tomorrow will never come then I have just wasted today.

I am happy with my job as a baby sitter. I enjoy being with kids because kids only knows to have fun and I feel like I am a child again when I am with them. Kids seem to have no problems at all. And I am already earning money and I can buy the things I want. I am able to help my mother too. But then there's still this something that I am looking for and money can never buy it.

I know what I really want in my life, I just want to be HAPPY. To be with people who makes me happy and I will be contented with that. But everytime I will tell other people about me going back in the Philippines, they will say, you are lucky that you are here now, a lot of people are dying to come here and now that you are here, you just want to go back. Well, I am not other people, this is me. This is my life, what I want to do with my life is different from what other people want to do with their life. If only I have the courage to really go on with my life the way I wanted it to be then I will never get stressed and I will be a much happier person. If ONLY...

Well I guess, as of now, I should learn how to enjoy the life I have for the moment and to cherish each day of my life. Because when tomorrow comes, this day will be gone forever and in it's place is something that I leave behind.

Got my new Camera!!!

I'm happy to have my own camera now and here are some of the pictures that I have taken. I am just a amateur photographer and this photos were taken while I am in the car. These places are around the Mornington Peninsula, Melbourne...

I love taking pictures, and just looking at them when I feel lonely and when I am bored...

Mount Sto. Tomas, Baguio City, Philippines

Mt. Sto Tomas is the highest peak in Baguio City where you can get a wonderful view of the city. From here, you can have a majestic view of almost the entire city of Baguio. A great scenery all the way up to Mount Sto. Tomas which will make you speechless. It's just the best place to catch almost the whole of Baguio City.

Almost a year has passed since we hiked on top of Mt. Sto Tomas but the feeling of being there is still fresh in my memory. I just can't forget that day when we started climbing up the mountain. At first, I feel like I can't reach the top of the mountain and thinking I will just take a jeepney going up, but when you start walking already, then it's just a matter of patience to get on top. Walking up to the mountain is a great experience especially when it is shared with friends and with a great company.

Being on top of the mountain makes me feel like I am close to heaven already especially when the clouds have started to go down, and I can feel the cold breeze passing through my face. Oh, it's really a good feeling to be there that day. I wish I can go back again to that place next time.

My First Australian Scrabble Tournament

Playing scrabble is one of the things that I love to do. It's one way of meeting new people while having fun. They say scrabble is boring but then when you really get to play it, it is a interesting one. I have been playing scrabble since grade 6 but that was only at home. But when I learned that there is a scrabble club in our city, that's the start of me joining scrabble tournaments. I was surprised and happy to know that there is a scrabble club in our city.

Now, that I am here in Australia, I tried to look for scrabble tournaments and I am glad that there are scrabble clubs here. At least I get to play scrabble here. So yesterday I went to Mt. Eliza. I just went there without having any idea about the place and the people. I was a little bit nervous getting inside asking myself "Will I be able to win even a single game?" because it's a different place and I will play with native English speakers which means they know more english words than I do. Hmmm, so my first game, I won which makes me feel good. My nervousness is going away and I'm having my confidence back again. I thought I would lose because he is leading in the beginning and he played a bonus word. But then I was able to catch up and win the game. So, I continue winning up to my fifth game. And during my last game, as usual I lost again by 2 points only. I should have won it if only I have taken the risk of putting the word "UGS" which I did not. Because I am not sure if it is a valid word. So I just played other word thinking that we will end up having the same score, but my tile tracking is wrong. So he ended up winning and I ended up losing by two points. How sad but then I have learned my lesson again, that next time "TRUST YOUR INSTINCTS". This is the third time that this happened to me. But it's alright because I still managed to end up second place which is a good start for me playing scrabble. And now, I am looking forward to joining more scrabble tournaments.

Another reason also why I love playing scrabble is that it's one way of meeting new people. Back in the Philippines, I have played with the journalists of our local newspaper, and see the good players from the different places of the country. So I get to know people not only from my same age but older people who inspires me. I really love playing scrabble that I will even absent myself from school just to play scrabble. And yesterday, I have also exchanged my work for scrabble. But it's worth it, I had fun and I have meet new people again. I met someone from Thailand who is a nice girl and someone from my own country. She's from Cebu.